Lately I have been suffering from procrastination. Not for lack of inspiration but something urgent comes up and I end up prioritising that instead. I need to write down and not assume in my head it's on my today's agenda. Enough about me, how have you all been? Assuming my multiple personalities are my audience *looks away ashamed* . In my mind I always picture a very good looking legible bachelor in his early forties say 42 because anything older than that has to be classified as robbery with violence ie he is trying to rob me of what's left of my youth which in English means I don't trust you. Again, let's not make this all about me *laughing sheepishly* .......
Being single for so long and please get me right am not talking about people who have been alone for a few hours or months yet they feel like life is so unfair and brutal. This year marks nine years not being in a relationship. So when I blog that I know what I want it means I have been selfish enough to learn what I like and what I don't. What I have had to tolerate and what I won't. Have I tried going on a few blind dates ofcourse and they have ended up teaching me that I am horrible at opening up.
Understand that when you are comfortable enough to trust someone else in terms of a relationship in my case a man, *notice how I wrote a man not the man* you allow yourself to be vunrable enough to go the extra mile to play the part girlfriend both physically and financially yet you end up breaking up, you feel broken. Not just emotionally but in your mind at that particular time and while healing you feel as though no one else is ever worth that much effort. So you stop and you become this shy person who is too scared and fragile to put themselves out there again.
Being single for so long makes you take for granted how sexy you truly are. Not that you are not but because your mind has led you to believe that man/woman no longer finds you attractive enough to take a chance on you thus left leaves you questioning the obvious. Think about it. How many people do you compliment in a day and they end up acting surprised? Have you ever stopped to see their reaction? Their body language tells you everything you need to know at that particular moment. There is nothing wrong with pulling a regular look on the inside but when you go lingerie shopping and zoom in on yourself....... Whoa! That's a hallelujah moment for me.
Do what makes you feel sexy. But don't risk your life and health trying to prove a point to a very hostile society. For me what exudes sexy is not your image because frankly speaking everyone looks good in their own unique ways and styles but confidence stands out. I have been working on myself on the inside and now am open minded to reflect it on the outside. I hope the world is ready for a game changer because like I always say different is so refreshing.
Pleasant night checkmates because am about to be someone's #RealityCheck ✌
