Its 2019 yet people have given up on love

People have given up on love but not me though. I am out here not only swimming but doing backstroke moves in my own madness. A party of one please! Thank you. Happy new year checkmates. 2019 is a year full of love. As have been the years before and years after but there is some magic for those crazy enough to believe it. What are my resolutions?  To be alive, stay alive and live like I am alive. It's a three kind of affair for me.

As we unwrap this marvellous year, there are moments I will share on social media. One it's not what I am saying  but rather two it's why I am saying it that matters. It's a year full of untold mysteries and game changing puzzles. I ushered in this year inlove. Everything about me feels so warm and welcoming. I am open to all possibilities this life has to offer. I have known myself to be a soul kind of lady but this year I go deeper. Most will confuse my confidence with arrogance. If it's not in line with my happiness it deserves my silence.

Listen with your eyes. Only the brave will work to keep it. My song 2019 happens to be by one talented man by the name Musiq Soulchild ~ yes  . The entire song leaves me feeling so vunrable  so let me share some of my favourite lines PEOPLE DON'T STICK AROUND,  BUILD YOU UP THEN LET YOU DOWN , I UNDERSTAND THAT YOU HAVE BEEN BURNED , HONESTY IS WHAT YOU DESERVE,  SO THAT'S WHAT I AM GIVING YOU ..... SO WHEN THE WORLD AND THE ODDS ARE AGAINST US , YOU WON'T HAVE TO QUESTION. .......CAUSE I AM MORE ATTRACTED TO WHAT'S INSIDE OF YOU, YOU DON'T HAVE TO GUESS, THE ANSWER IS YES.

Words have power. Those above leave me feeling both empowered and humble. Why are people giving up so easily? Is it because what they want doesn't exist or they are simply settling for what they have come across? Why!? You cannot change another human being unless they are willing to change on their own.  Listen, you have it. You have always had it but you have been trying to convince the wrong people. You are an ocean but you have been living as if you are a pothole praying for it rain , waiting to be filled.

Some of you this year will need to be reminded of how amazing you are without you even trying too hard. You are hilarious. What you say makes perfect sense. If you must fail to get over that fear then by all means fail but don't postpone that dream any longer. Don't complain if you are not going to do anything different about it. Some of you need to divorce and break up with social media and go work and fix your personal lives. Don't just say you are someone's friend this year be a true friend. I will not like your instagram pictures not because I am jealous of your new car instead I will dive into your DM and ask the brutal questions? I saw you new car, congratulations but I saw something more which drew my attention...... Why are that sad? The reason why I used the example of a car is because I love cars.

Live your truth ladies and gentlemen.

Be bold 2019.

Ladies, don't be afraid to ask for what you want. Baibee am not saying you have drained what's left of my youth but what are your intentions with me this year? Some of you could be waiting just to end up being a stepping stone or worse a helper to the one *laughing sheepishly* true story. Gentlemen,  I am not a man but I have dated and have brothers as well as male friends so please don't say you want a decent lady while your out there warming your manhood in any available open hole like respect yourself. This is not hip-hop so stop hopping around grasshopper.

No amount of success, connection or wealth can buy back health and life. All your life you have been a life is too short and YOLO for the last ten years. Same song different partner. Same strategy with worse results. Forget your titles and influence on social media, who is the real you? Are you using the avenues you have been given to compensate what the basic you lacks in reality? Do yourself a favour this year, choose yourself.

This is how to test if you are happy on your own. Are you doing what everyone else is doing or are you so wrapped up in your own world everyone else wants in on the action? Everyone is the boss of their life but how authentic are you? Before you like or retweet ask yourself this, "Does this reflect who I am or am I hoping to attract what I am after?". 2019 let this be your #RealityCheck. 

Enjoy the rest of your year checkmates.

The beginning and last of December 2018

New month, new adventures,  new romance,  new kind of blessings, new positivity and new mysteries 😇 ....... my response this month is hallelujah 🤗 . The beginning of a new month yet the end of a well God planned year. I didn't blog much because I was in the middle of a very important lesson. I didn't post much because I had to take in that very moment. I didn't travel much because I had plenty of work and skills to acquire where I was. I didn't put myself first because others needed me more. So if I come off a little selfish at the very end is because I did all what I had been assigned and even though there is no trophy or certificate to show just how much I put in extra effort 2018, baibee my smile says it all. I didn't require much because there was so much more I had to discover deep within myself. My biggest lesson this year happens to be this

YOU DON'T NEED ICING TO ENJOY CAKE. WHAT MAKES THE CAKE ARE THE INGREDIENTS.

So for those of you who are probably expecting more from me at the end of this year, darling those are your expectations not mine. No man wants me like that mama and daddy you gotta postpone that (mjengo) because that dowry issa no 😂😂. Just like icing everything else is just a decoration rather a plus/bonus to add on but not necessarily who I am.

And just like that I mean, I have just blogged 😆😎.

A toast to the beginning and last of 2018 *here here*🍾🍾🍾🍾🍾

Happy holidays from my heart to my head checkmates.

I can but I won't #NOvember

I am a product whore...... I will purchase the most expensive product because  (common sense ) Expensive is cheap to maintain then if I don't get the desired results in two days or one week, am out. I have committment issues until I get the one that has it all.

I know am not the only one. From my face to the rest of my body I have experimented with different products more than five times in a month. So, does that mean I have a hard time staying faithful? Honestly speaking yes and no.

The one that has it all as far as men go he has to have most of the qualities. If a man can't engage me in a conversation I then I don't know what this creature has to offer me. It better not be the same old boring routine like how are you, how was your day? I don't need a man who thinks rather one who knows what he wants. The most I can give a man is my phone number the rest I just let him figure it out. You are the man after all right, then show me!

I am an Aquarius for those of you wondering so everything you have read regarding my kind could be true or false. All I can tell you is the more you get to know me in person, the more attached and protective of me you will become. I am just stating facts. The hardest part is not me being picky but rather you keeping me interested. I sound like a job now don't I *laughing sheepishly*

Ladies and gentlemen don't just go with the flow, have and state your standards because I can but I won't.  And that is my #RealityCheck. 

Lovely day checkmates

#BringingBackTheGoodOldLove

I am uptight but this October is giving me butterflies. For the last couple of months I have been working on my energy. I am glad it's paying off. I will never tire of crowing myself as the ultimate Aquarius lady because am a puzzle even to myself. I have multiple conversations in my head every five minutes so believe me when I say oh I know . Everything you are about to say I pretty much covered in high school so you have years to catch up with me.

Recently, I bumped into my childhood crush. One of them anyway like I just didn't want to rub it to his face there were others *laughing sheepishly*. I watched girls fight over him as I was a serious tomboy so I was one of the boys if not invisible. We were a circle of three Myself, him and my other crush. In my head they would fight for me . He is as appealing as he will ever be but that's just it. He took me by surprise when he asked for my number just how I like it.  Was I about to upgrade my childhood crush from a dude to a man or was I thirstloading? I wish he was not charming but he is *damn it* my ego is doing the happy dance.

Sometimes we are so busy working towards being successful and there is nothing wrong with that but we forget the little things that makes us unique #BringingBackTheGoodOldLove . When was the last time you giggled?

I am mature now, am ready for that love. How many people can honestly and openly admit to this? Are we so broken that we have learnt to push everyone away? So desperate that we are afraid to ask for what we truly want? Or just wasting precious time dismissing ourselves by blaming it on I have nothing to offer?

This October there are people who need to slow down and others who need to keep up with their dreams by following their hearts. We all need to give ourselves permission to not only give but be willing to receive the kindness and love back. Ofcourse you are independent no one is questioning your masculinity or femininity but two heads are better than one. Having written this and expectant of the butterflies that come with positive energy for now let this not only be my #RealityCheck but yours as well.

From my soul to yours, pleasant surprises checkmates.

Tonight is that night

There is something so magical about the sky tonight.  It's one of  those nights I have always known existed but I can't prove it.  When I look up the only song in mind is "Grab somebody sexy tell them hey, give me everything tonight." It's one of those nights where you can't fake it.

I am trying to explain but I swear am not making sense but if you are out there reading this or living it out come tomorrow morning you will have known. This is not for the cheap men at heart or those who think all you can ever offer a woman is money. Wrong blog sirs kindly stop reading and walk away.

This is the night. It's a first date night. Feels like it. Butterflies, excitement and hopeful expectations. It's a I like you night. I have always liked you. I am falling for you without even knowing or caring if anyone approves or not. It's a I want you to see yourself in my eyes kind of night.

Tonight doesn't require much but undeniable attraction and affection. It's a you give me a heaven on earth spirit in the atmosphere kind of night. It's an I love my work but being with you right here and now taking in this very moment is priceless. It's a you are my life kind of night.

It's a quiet night . It's a thankful night. Indeed it's a God night because only He would breathe to life such an excellency. I am humbled to have witnessed tonight because it just gave me a #RealityCheck.

Lovely night checkmates.

Different People

When someone tells you that they are different, please believe them. You can be in a room full of people and still feel alone. You can be raised in a loving home and still grow up feeling unloved. Challenges of being different makes others question how you view life because they will never see the bigger picture.

Most normal people are afraid of failure. Different people embrace failure and use it as motivation to better themselves. When you change your questions from who to what you will understand that the only person you need to convince is yourself. It is not about life rejecting or hurting me but rather just how bad do I need it in my life in order for me to commit.

Love brings out another side in every one of us. Good or bad I really don't know but this much am sure. I don't know anyone else the way I know myself. It is not what you won't do , it is what I won't put up with. People who are different don't take the term/word us in relationships seriously. By us it usually means  I, Me and Myself. I am not worried about you, am worried about me.

Different people will only stop the day there is no longer magic and they will end up viewing you just like everyone else or even worse ie the enemy. Don't ever stop being special in the eyes of a different person because then they will resent you and everything else you represent. 

Different people will never hide who they truly are to stroke your ego. They are open minded and very opinionated. If they have nothing polite to say they will simply smile or walk away avoiding eye contact. That is a dangerous sign because what it means is that they have you all figured out.  Different people lack in areas they can't explain because their minds know beyond what their eyes see. Different people seek things that are beyond normal because that is their #RealityCheck.

The Man After My heart

He had me at a mighty man of wealth. That left a smile on my face while questioning how wealthy is wealth?  And she went, and came, and gleaned in the field after the reapers and her hap was to light on a part of the field belonging unto Boaz, who was of the kindred of Elimelech.

And, behold, Boaz came from Bethlehem, and said unto the reapers, The Lord be with you. And they answered him, The Lord bless thee.

 All I know and can take from this is that here is a determined woman who did everything she could not for herself but for her mother in law and still it wasn't enough because her hap was to light on a part belonging to him  *God has a sense of humor* and in the midst of her hard work and struggle behold he came. Wait, say that again .....he came. He not only came but the way he addressed his reapers humbles my heart. The respect between Boaz and the reapers amazes me like it was that one of a kind moment so much so that the conversations they had, had to be written in the bible. That in itself tells me what kind of a man and leader Boaz was. A man after my heart. 


Then said Boaz unto his servant that was set over the reapers, Whose damsel is this? Its as if something stronger than his spirit drove him there. He was focused and even safe to say he knew what he wanted because immediately he took notice of her in such an overwhelming way he just had to know her. Then said Boaz unto Ruth, Hearest thou not, my daughter? Go not to glean in another field, neither go from hence, but abide here fast by my maidens . Boaz was very protective of her and you can tell secretly he wanted her all to himself. To me this is the most romantic story in the entire bible. 

The Lord recompense thy work, and a full reward be given thee of the Lord God of Israel, under whose wings thou art come to trust. Are there still men who do this? Bless the women in their lives? 

My definition of wealth thanks to Boaz is not only knowing God but fearing and having a relationship with him. That is what makes this man stand out to me and the most desirable.  I believe deep down Boaz had been praying for a Ruth because when he saw her he knew exactly what to say and do. 

Just like this mysterious love story we all go through life battling things that seem like they are weighing us down just like Ruth. The truth is whatever you have been praying and working hard for in a weird way will cause your answer to appear like a Boaz. And, behold it will come .  Like Ruth I pray you wont miss your opportunity of redemption and blessings because it won't come in an obvious way that's why you need to trust your heart and listen to that still voice because unlike your eyes it sees and already knows. 

The book of Ruth happens to be my #RealityCheck