Anyone who knows me knows that there is nothing rushed about my faith. I am a fool for God. Now don't think that just because I am a believer or Christian it guarantees that I will abandon my faith and live life the way society wants. I am a rebellious and ratchet fool who will show up minutes later but will get the job done.
Where do I begin? Have you ever lowered your standards just to fit in the humble cycle? To just belong for a season see how life is like from that 'humble' perspective? I did that mistake but knowing myself it wasn't a mistake but a learning experience. I went for something I didn't want but the mistake was I prayed and asked God to give me the grace for it. Listen, don't weigh God down with your downgrades EVER. I should have prayed for world peace but having a stubborn spirit I wanted God to break any better mentality I may or might have adopted along the way.
I also asked for clarity. Have you ever found yourself in a routine? You wake up motivated only to come back at the end of the day previously on lost. As though your life has no purpose that is how my bestfriend would put it. She is very wise. To me clarity comes with sight so your eyes and heart are the victims of what your mind is feeding you. By that I mean, for your eyesight to be clear you will need to get rid of the impurities by shedding afew tears every now and then. You have got to admire how I cover up my way of showing my emotions with such poetry.
By now you should know I am talking about two stories and this is the third one. The reason why I insist that my bestfriend is the second most wisest lady on the face of the universe is because she taught me how loving God is a priceless investment. You know how you can be so broke am not talking about being temporarily out of money but you only have life which is free but if it wasn't, you wouldn't afford it. I am talking about where you don't start prayers with Our Father Who but rather Oh God Why? Everything looks like a punishment. Have you ever been broken and desperate in prayer that you found yourself demanding then negotiating with God. You start off strong praising and adoring him then you sleep, wake up in tears screaming until you black out then you find yourself whispering God let your will be done at the very end. If you have never gone to such extremes you have never wanted it bad enough.
I was taught the art of tithing and giving. At first it was hard. I mean I was unemployed for a while then you are asking me to take breadcrumbs of a pay and tithe. Girl, our Lord understands. It's my time I used to justify to not have to tithe but in the end I would do it as she was the only person who believed in me. Have you ever had that one person who saw something in you when all you see is what society disapproved? Again if you have never experienced this, perhaps this is not your kind of blog.
How long am I willing to wait? As long as it takes to get God's attention. I am holding on to the fact that there is a One Day but the one I love the most in the bible happens to be in the book of Ruth. My name, JUST then! Early Sunday morning I woke up, set my tithe aside and JUST when I was about to leave I heard it. Give me more. I always try to out loud the whispers by praising and worshipping. You know am a fool for you God. I know you do but you can give more. I don't mind adding a thousand or two. More!!! Jesus more? Okay. A little more. That is when a let out a sigh ... Lord I know this is the much you want me to give so I will stop there. Deep in my spirit I knew I had to give twice more but have you ever had plans rather a been on a tight budget and the Lord asked for it all. I stopped and rebuked the devil for trying to steal my finances by sending me a spirit of confusion. I felt it again so I prayed and asked God that if truly that was his will for me give everything in my purse that he shows me a sign.
I left confident that God was clear on me "not to give anymore than I planned". Towards the end of the sermon the preacher confirmed my fears. He even went ahead and gave the example of how chimpanzees love nuts and how easy it is to catch them. Some of you are holding on to nuts when God is asking you to trust that you let go of nuts for him to give you something better.
What was meant to be yours will find its way. What God intended to be yours will be owned by you debt free but there is a price to pay. You will have to stand out, at times alone with God, have faith and the hardest process of all WAIT. God's timing is impeccable.
In the words of my beautiful mother, baby this is just the beginning of what awaits you. And this I my #RealityCheck. My testimony. Keep the faith checkmates.
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