Dear Selfish Men,

Dear Selfish Men,
It is with deep sadness that I have to write this letter because I am tired of having this conversation in my mind.  You are amazing and I both applaud and appreciate your effort but you are taken.  It takes someone who is broken and mature to embrace this ugly truth. You want me, and I want you just as bad but you are taken.

I recognise that I am living in a man's world with submission traits in me but I refuse to participate in this joke. I understand life is short but why must I end mine to better yours? Why must I put my dreams on hold to support yours?

Married men, stop that! You made a vow to God to love her yet you are out here causing her to face some serious jail time for murder knowing very well you won't leave her. Let me break it down here real quick. If you can't honour God the giver of life by keeping your word am I supposed to assume you will give me the world with your unhappy soul? If you can't make her half that happy and yet she somehow completes you and looks to you for everything after everything you have put her through do you think I will be faithful to you the minute I learn you are less of the man you come off to be? Child please!

Gentlemen in relationships, please stick to familiar and if not end it. You can have your cake and eat it too right? Baibee, am clay! Under alot of pressure I will break. Listen, we are all created differently. Not everyone is looking for happily ever after because if you did you wouldn't settle for half the deal. I refuse to move in with you until you marry me. This is not playing hard to get or having unrealistic expectations. If we both want different things that's okay but denying myself the opportunity to find someone who understands my silence and intentions doesn't necessarily mean I am naive or dumb.

I call you selfish because you either already have that happiness or have tasted it. You can't teach an old dog new tricks. I would hate to discourage you but the reality is you are not Solomon in the bible.  Fix your relationship with God first then work on your life. No feast for kiundu. If you are ashamed of your marriage I am not a shrink nor a priest. Again, go to church and have your pastor advise you on that. If you and the one on probation are constantly on this on and off relationship and you are tempted to test the waters by seeing other people while on break, I am not a game nor a stadium.  No one here is your cheerleader.  If you think what you are used to is either old or boring sir, I am ten times worse.  You think she is not trendy, I am stone age.  Don't do it. Don't gamble your life away by thinking you are missing out because in actual sense you have everything you need right infront of you. You just need to spice things up.

Selfish Men,  please make it work. If you think she is old, guess who aged her by giving her his problems and supporting you through thick and thin. If am being honest, you don't deserve her. Neither do you deserve me. I can never take over or match up her standards both good and bad. She took the time to know you.  I don't have that prestige and patience to tolerate you. When she says she understands she is secretly looking for ways to put a smile back on your frown. If I say I understand, it simply means I am looking for your replacement.

Don't start something you won't finish.

Let's allow people who are not committed a chance to be truly happy.

You are not a bad person for wanting more but you are going at it in a very self centred selfish way.

Yours sincerely,
#RealityCheck.