An open love letter from my disappointed self

I want to start off by thanking you for being vunrable enough to share this letter with those that know you, are trying to understand you and those that are too scared  to admit that they are going through the same process.

Writing this will automatically mean that I have lost but that's where I come in and assure myself  that sometimes success comes even in the smallest of wins. But no one wants a petty win. For it to qualify as a win it has to have some substantial value right? See everytime I find myself  thinking this, it's my fear getting the best of me.

What of my dreams?

*pauses with balancing tears*

It's okay to not be okay sometimes.

*in almost a whisper* I can cry that disappointment away but no matter how loudly or heartedly I do it won't change the fact that I still believe in dreams.

Exactly!!!

Come rain or sunshine, morning or dawn, sunrise to sunset , the sun , moon and stars do any of those change the fact that the sky still remains the sky?

That's how loyal and faithful God has been over mylife.

When I asked, He gave me
When I didn't ask, He still provided.
When I didn't expect,  He still surprised me.

Why do I still call them disappointments when in actual sense that was my will over my life and not God.

And so I pen this open love letter from my disappointed self

Listen,
God loves you. His plans over your life surpass your dreams. Why do you walk around with your head held down with shame just because by the looks of it others are "ahead?". You will never be perfect because then you would never need God and that's why He is a jealous God. If He thought you needed "your dreams" fulfilled He would have. There's what you see for yourself then there is what God has for you. 

No one knows you better than your disappointments. Everytime we come knocking you down you always find a way to pick yourself up. You are one tough lady. Instead of walking beating yourself down because materialistically speaking you have nothing to flaunt you carry on as if you have this golden life.

Thank you for teaching me hard lessons that have molded me to be better and come out the bigger person.

I love the valuable lessons you carry with you each time as God's way of letting me that I sm getting too comfortable.

I haven't denied you of the good just because of afew bad breaks. On the contrary, the bad always comes with you good. If anything you should be thanking me because my job is to ensure you are well equipped to handle the good. 

I haven't robbed you of your dreams instead I have been preparing you from your will to usher in God's will.

You have been walking around with a heavy heart and viewing things from an ungodly perspective.

Now open your eyes and let your heart guide you to where your blessing lies.

I love you way too much to watch you ruin the greatness within you.

Now arise and shine.

Yours Loving,
You had it all figured wrong.